Tis’ the season for holiday work parties. If you read my post, “30 Day Challenge – Day 11” I discussed attendance. Today I want to talk about drinking with your coworkers.
I have worked in both the start-up and the tech world. Additionally, I worked in midtown Manhattan. All of this is to say, I’m no stranger to mixing booze and work. There were monthly happy hours, conferences and meet-ups, all of which included drinking. And, whether right or wrong, there was usually beer in the fridge. In fact, my group was so comfortable mixing drinking and work that management often passed out drinks in the office once it got past 5PM.
There’s a lot going on here and in a future post I’d like to really dive in to the concept around this “culture” but for now let’s focus on a question most have had to deal with regardless of where they work or the type of industry they work in. Should you drink at your work’s holiday party?
I think the first question you have to ask yourself is, how are you with drinking? If you have no issue limiting your intake, you have no history of struggling to control how much you drink, and you have a safe plan to get home afterward then in my opinion it’s okay to partake in some casual drinking at your work party where alcohol is being provided.
The reason you should pause to ask yourself these questions is this is work – don’t get confused. Yes, it might be after hours or even IN A BAR but this is being hosted by your EMPLOYER. So ultimately, it’s still a work event and you should treat it as such. Think of it like when you were younger. If you went on a field trip, even if it’s to an amusement park, it’s a school function and you would still get in trouble by the school if you were caught doing something that violated school policy. Don’t be fooled by the “party” atmosphere, you are still at work.
So what do you do if you do struggle to control your intake or you don’t have a safe way home after the party? Should you not go? I think the best way to handle this is to be honest. Be honest with yourself and with your coworkers. If being around people who drink is too much for you because you know you won’t be able to control yourself, you must acknowledge this. People will respect that. Alcoholism is still not something people always know how to talk about but I think people get it and would never want to put you in danger (if they don’t get it then I’d strongly re-evaluate your work environment and if it’s the healthiest place for you).
Only you know your limits.
Are you able to walk or drive over to the party with your coworkers, order juice or soda, indulge in the appetizers, and hang out for a bit before saying your goodbyes and heading home? The beginning of the party is when everyone is still sober so if you don’t want to completely miss out on the event (I’ll go deeper into the reasons why you wouldn’t want to miss the party in a future post) this is a nice compromise. If there’s a dinner first, even better! You can enjoy dinner and then head home before the real drinking begins.
But if you know being around other people drinking is going to trigger you and you won’t be able to stop – don’t be ashamed to decline the invite. Make an extra effort to connect with coworkers in other ways and maybe even get involved in your office’s party planning for future holidays and events. You’re probably not alone in wanting an opportunity to bond with colleagues and celebrate that doesn’t necessarily promote drinking with coworkers. One year, my company had all of us attend a cooking class. In teams, we worked together to prepare our dinner and then everyone ate together. That was the party! After that is when folks decided they wanted to keep the party going and drink but it was totally optional and by that point we had all spent a few hours together so anyone who dipped out didn’t miss much.
What are your thoughts on drinking with coworkers? Do you think differently about those who do versus those who don’t drink at company events when alcohol is being provided? Have you experienced for yourself or witnessed others who’ve let their drinking get out of hand and did it impact their employment or was it ignored?
As I mentioned, in a future post I’d like to dig into this topic a bit more. For now, remember to be honest with yourself and your coworkers – never feel like you need to sacrifice your health or your safety to “connect”.
Emily's Esoterica 